Yesterday around midnight, I had a long solo walk. Dressed in old jeans, a hood on top of my head and deep thoughts in it. My sole aim was to answer this simple yet difficult question:
“If I was free to do anything I wanted right now, what would I do?”
Before I tell you what I figured out, and how you can benefit from that, we must first go a few weeks into the past.
The past 2-3 weeks have been the most relaxing ones in the last year or so. I visited Slovenia, my home country to host an event and visit my family & friends. At the same time, I significantly reduced my workload. From the usual 40-50h/week, I now only worked about 25-30 focused hours. Very soon, something remarkable started to happen…
In those 2-3 weeks I:
- got to hang out with some of my old friends again.
- ate lunch with my family several times, my dad, my mom, my siblings, cousins…went to a weekend martial arts seminar.
- lead the unfolding of the 8th Young Styles Battle (breakdance event for kids).
- ate pizza 3 times.
And not only actions, but my thinking has also shifted as well:
- I started to think about taking up dance lessons again.
- I wondered when the next magic the gathering pre-release tournament is.
- I am thinking about how to spend more quality time with people close to me.
- I am starting to think about traveling for the sake of traveling again.
- I have started to think about out of the box strategy for my business over the weekend.
So in short, I have started to DO things, and THINK about things that I used to love. I realized that a lot of the activities, things, and relationships where I would previously find joy and fulfillment were simply not a part of my life anymore.
I spent most of my waking time and energy on Hustler Marketing (my biz). And while our team grew to about 30 in 18 months, and while we’re growing fast and doing some really cool sh*t with email, there was simply only space for very little else.
Now we’re getting close to the mindfu*k.
The reason I started Hustler Marketing was to become financially independent, live where I want and wake up when I want. By hard work and grace, I was delivered all that. Lately, the feeling of contribution and making Hustler into an epic place to work at has become more and more prominent…
But that’s beside the point. The point is, I got what I wanted. So why the fu*k am I killing myself wanting more and more?
Let’s leave this question opened for a little longer, and let’s rather answer the one from yesterday’s night walk – “If I was free to do anything I wanted right now, what would I do?”
After about 2 hours and 10,000 steps or so, I came to these answers:
- take up dance lessons again
- spend more time with my girl
- write more
- spend more time relaxing, not working
- do some more pleasure traveling
If you look at the above list, you will see that I’m a pretty simple guy, I don’t need that much to be happy.
But to add weight, let’s also quote/paraphrase Ray Dalio on this: “Good food, good bed, good sex are some of the best things in life. And they don’t get much better if you make lots of money, or worse if you do not.”
If you don’t believe me, believe him. His net worth is 18 billion.
Here’s the mindfuck. I already “have” everything needed for a good life according to my standards. So if I’m not happy, that’s entirely my choice. Or better said, my habit.
The same goes for you.
If I may dare suggest something to you, and quite egoistically believe you to actually do it, it is this one thing:
Go on your own walk, and ask yourself: “If I could do anything I want, what would I be doing?”
In most cases, unless your ambitions are really high, you can already do what you really want.
If not, here are a few cheat codes:
#1 Is that desire mine, or somebody else’s? If you truly look deep inside, do you really crave a sports car? Some people do. But fewer than you’d think.
#2 What is in the core of that desire? Is it an object, or is that object a symbol of something else?
Now that being said, don’t get me wrong. Having goals is super important. It’s what makes you get out of the bed in the morning. The pursuit of mastery in any area is addictive and fulfilling.
I still want to make more money, and lots of it. Get Hustler Marketing to 7-figures and beyond. There are definitely a few more books inside of me too, and probably another business venture or two. Maybe more mentoring/teaching too, who knows.
But I’m not going to let “not having” those things yet prevent me from being happy right now.
What about you?
“tldr:” version: I wanna say I am feeling relaxed. And that this relaxedness allowed me to understand we can ALREADY have what we really want right now.