I wish I could tell you that you are. But you’re not. And realizing that will be very painful. I don’t expect you to believe me, or buy into this. But if you do, you might as well start getting ready now.
It’s like when you try learning ice skating or snowboarding. You know you will fall on your ass a lot. You’re not offended, it’s not personal. You just know you WILL land on your ass. Since you know that, it’s a lot easier to just get up and try again. Till you can actually stay on your feet, uhm, skates, for more than 10 seconds.
It hurts to see so many talented people full of ambition charge straight into a brick wall. It hurts, especially if they’re close to you.
You know they’re not ready, but there’s not much you can do. If you tell them not to try at all, you’re a dick. If you tell them about all the problems they can expect, most will get disheartened and quit. There really is no “pain-free” solution here.
Growth is painful.
You see, there is a “level 0” type of a person. Level 0 means they never try at all. Comfort is nice and they’re happy with that. But let me reassure you, if you’re reading this, you’re not level 0. And it’s not a bad thing, by the way, the blissful ignorance.
Level 1 person is thinking about the growth. Always thinking about it. Many ideas. Knows all the theories. But never tries. I’d argue that this is the worst stage to be at. If you’re level 0 you at least don’t know. Here at level 1 you see the opportunity but will never taste it. That sucks.
Level 2 is going at it but failing. This is a messed up stage until you learn to love it. Only grace/karma/unicorns can tell how long you will be at this stage. Maybe all your life. Maybe you’ll get pushed back to level 1. Maybe you’ll get to level 3.
Get comfortable with the grind cus it might take awhile.
Level 3 is going at it and getting results. Congrats, oh mighty one. As soon as you’re tired of the champagne showers, try to go to level 4 and actually help out people.
Level 4 is being a total gangster and not giving a shit. Or in nicer words, being provided for and at peace, full abundance. Then you can actually start helping other people without wanting something in return.
So what’s the point of all this?
The big idea is coming. Are you ready?
*If you have the grace to KNOW that you WILL get hurt, get a helmet.*
You will need to overcome level 2 if you are to do any real growth. There will be a level 2 in the gym, in your relationship, in your business… in life. There’s always a level 2 you need to pass, and it will suck. And it will hurt. So be smart, get a helmet.
There are two types of helmets I can think of now, there could be more.
Not the pussy ass meditation you do with your little phone app. “Oh I just meditated for 15min and I’m all enlightened.” Sure, okay, whatever.
Go ahead and feel great about your little meditation. Just don’t expect that to keep you centred when the shit hits the fan. Unless you’ve spent hundreds of hours in deep meditation (mental gym), it won’t help enough.
It doesn’t last forever by the way. Deep and prolonged period of meditation does have lasting changes to your behavior and wellbeing, bit there is still the momentum.
If you meditate regularly, it’s just going to work better.
#2 Getting a mentor who’s done it before.
There are two problems with mentors you can find online/around.
First one and the biggest is, they can be scammers. You know, making more money out of teaching others how to make money. And all that BS. Do your research first.
Second one, they can be legit, but you don’t relate. It’s kinda like in the gym, not every workout/nutrition plan is for everyone.
Or maybe more like therapy. Someone really smart I recently met talked about this… the archetypes of coaching/therapy relationships. The martyr, the savior, transference. Some people just want to complain and the mentor doesn’t know how to handle it etc. It can get messed up.
The point being, you need a connection with your mentor, a strong degree of trust. Otherwise, it won’t work either.